I can’t understand why people say my
I can’t understand why people say my girlfriend’s legs look like matchsticks. They do look like sticks – but they certainly don’t match.
I’ve just come back from the beauty parlour.
I’ve just come back from the beauty parlour. Pity it was closed!
She’s the kind of girl that boys look at twice
She’s the kind of girl that boys look at twice – they can’t believe it the first time.
Fred: What’s
Fred: What’s that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders? Harry: Help! What is it? Fred: Your head!
Bill: My sister has lovely
Bill: My sister has lovely long red hair all down her back. Will: Pity it’s not on her head.
A little boy came running into the kitchen.
A little boy came running into the kitchen. ‘Dad, dad’ he said, ‘there’s a monster at the door with a really ugly face’ ‘Tell him you’ve already got one,’ said his father !
I’m not ugly. I could
I’m not ugly. I could marry anyone I pleased! But that’s the problem – you don’t please anyone.
Did you hear about the girl monster who wasn’t
Did you hear about the girl monster who wasn’t pretty and wasn’t ugly ? She was pretty ugly
First Witch: I went to the beauty parlor
First Witch: I went to the beauty parlor yesterday. I was there for three hours. Second Witch: Oh, what did you have done? First witch: Nothing, I was just going in for an estimate.
Mary: Do you think my sister’s pretty
Mary: Do you think my sister’s pretty ? Gary: Well, let’s just say if you pulled her pigtail she’d probably say ‘oink, oink ‘!
